Happy new years!
Some kid at a party I went to who was 20…maybe he was on drugs …but he asked me how old I was….he was twenty or something like that………..and when I told him he was freaking out….it illuminated how young he was and how much time he had to do whatever it is he did………at first his strange stammering joy of this fact bothered me a tad…….it’s always frustrating to experience a giddy ignorant kid wasting his time relishing his youth………….but then the smarter side of me remembers how lucky it is to have all that shit over-with..considering that no matter how you slice it…you are only 20 for x amount of hours or days….regardless of when born……and I don’t think I would want to be that age in the year 2007 if I had a choice….and counting on the fact that you can’t be something twice…unless you are the devil or something…which I’m not…..but I like his horns. I later saw this same kid ebullient over a marijuana cigarette, fall into a picnic table, I think I’m carrying on with time, meaning…my interests, thoughts, all though not as much…sense of responsibility has trailed along with the biological ticking on. Unlike many other people I’ve encountered, I’m proud that I had not been Mr. Adult from some awful teen age……measuring my actions and behavior against some tight fitting cascade of goals and all that ossifying soul stuff that driving so hard in that direction portends….. I am happy to be 32 years old in the year 2007 godamn it…!!!!!!!!
….I’m glad about all the accidental bits and bites, surges and flatteners attending the carriage and jet ride of this life so far